Obama, “I’m Going To DisneyWorld!”

The commercials are well known.  A pro athlete wins a big game and is asked, “What are you going to do now?”  The standard answer is either, “I’m going to Disneyland,” or “I’m going to DisneyWorld.”  That is because they have conquered something big and deserve the ultimate reward.  So when President Obama says he is going to DisneyWorld, I find myself wondering, what the hell for?  What have you accomplished?  I mean if we are grading on a scale of “could have been worse,” I guess he accomplished something.  We aren’t worse…yet.  Or if we were using the Marxist scale of government control and takeover, I suppose I would agree that he has gotten something done worthy of honor to a complete Commie.

DisneyWorld is dubbed, “The happiest place on earth.”  President Obama is the birth agent of malaise.  How can these two things come together?  There will be a shifting of the earth on its axis!  Cinderella’s castle will most certainly crumble as Obamy takes the stage in her forecourt on Thursday.  Does the President even know that Mickey Mouse is running against him for the presidency as a write-in candidate?  How can Mickey stand on the stage near the President without everyone mistaking this for a debate.  And we all know Mickey would kick Obamy’s ass!  I’ve never witnessed Mickey using a teleprompter.

The President is supposedly coming on this campaign stop to tout the importance of tourism and travel and point out how central it is to our economy.  I find myself wondering why the king of everything green would be pushing for more people to drive and fly. Imagine the carbon footprint!  Egad man, how many polar bears have to die to keep Florida tourism booming!?  Do Klondike and Snow at SeaWorld know what this man is promoting?  Oh the humanity!

I personally hope the Secret Service keeps a watchful eye on the President because he just might be swept away by Disney cast members who mistake him for Jafar out of costume and are worried that it will trouble the little kiddies to see Jafar out of his costume.  You’ve got to admit that the resemblance is striking: The same upward tilt of the head in sheer arrogance, the same desire for ultimate power and that same evil laugh!  Obamy even has his own genie right there at the White House, Valerie Jarrett.  She can make anything happen that he desires.

Okay, so in reality the President is using this photo-op as a chance to ride the teacups and yell, “Off with their heads.”  Alright, alright, he actually wants to come dismantle Space Mountain just like he dismantled NASA.  The truth actually is he wants to cram down our throats another heinous program called Global Entry that will make it easier for some international travelers to come into the country.  I imagine a VISA being held by a twenty something Pakistani will be tops on the list for Global Entry.  The White House is claiming that these people who will pass through customs easily and quickly are “pre-approved, low-risk travelers.”  Yeah I’m sure.

As Obama…oops…I mean Jafar likes to say, “You little fool. You thought you could defeat the most powerful being on Earth.”  That is what he takes us for.  We must stuff him into the genie lamp and bury it deep.  I hear there is a nice desert over in Saudi Arabia.